If a foolproof means of helping your kids survive your divorce existed, you'd likely want to learn more about it. However, there's no right or wrong way to cope, and you know your kids better than anyone. There will be good days and bad.
There are methods that other parents have used to help their children adapt to post-divorce lifestyles. Keeping these in mind and also being unafraid to reach out for support if you need it can increase the chances for overcoming obstacles that arise.
Things you should and should not do to help children cope with divorce
Your parenting style may be very different from your former spouse's. In fact, such differences may be part of what led to your divorce. It's always best if you are both willing to cooperate and compromise as needed, and it helps to know there is legal support available if a particular issue seems impossible to resolve without the court's intervention.
The following list includes tips that may be helpful in your situation:
- Do not make light of any situation that is causing them concern. For instance, if their other parent keeps canceling visits because of feigned illness or other extenuating circumstances and they see pictures posted on social networks of their parent out having a great time with friends, it's probably better to address the matter head-on rather than try to shirk it off as unimportant.
- Having a plan B is one way to help children overcome stressful situations involving canceled visitation dates or other problems with the other parent.
- Help your children understand your divorce was not their fault.
- Let them know they can share their feelings with you at any time. Having open lines of communication is a major factor toward success.
- Keep negative comments about your ex away from the kids. It's also best to avoid arguing with your former spouse in front of your kids.
As a family, you will experience many changes following your divorce. The more you can maintain your children's daily routines, the better. If the other parent is refusing to obey to an existing court order, that's another matter altogether, which can be dealt with in court.
An experienced Pennsylvania family law attorney is a great source of support to have on hand in such circumstances.